When given the choice between finding a partner fast and finding the right partner period, high achievers respond that they want the right partner fast, period. Joey Klein offers a 4-week virtual Relationship Bootcamp through his personal mastery training system, Inner Matrix Systems. Here is his advice for how high-achievers can attract a partner that fits their lifestyle.
To Swipe or Not to Swipe?
A common complaint is that swiping takes too much time. That’s fair, but so does dating—and studies show that online dating may ultimately be more efficient. This is because couples who enter committed relationships through online dating are more likely to have conversations about core values sooner than through traditional dating methods, which may be linked to decreased divorce rates. While you can use any dating app, it may help to use dating apps geared towards professionals and high-achievers.
If swiping isn’t for you, you’re going to have to learn to put yourself out there and maximize your in-person social networking opportunities. The people you encounter in your everyday routine and hobbies are potential matches waiting to happen, as they may already have something in common with you. Study up on how to look more approachable and how to make the first move—and practice, practice, practice. Be aware of social cues that come from body language and, above all else, be genuine and sincere.
Trust Their Actions and Be Honest About Who You Are and What You Want
For the most part, people are going to show you who they are early on. They may want to project an image of themselves to impress you, but intrinsic signs are difficult to hide for long. So, pay attention to what their actions show they value and what they don’t. Do not try to change them or wait for them to change themselves.
In the same way, you need to show them who you are and what your priorities are upfront. Having discussions about core values early on—such as whether you want children,, where you want to live, whether you are a spender or a saver, etc.—can save you from spending too much time on a person who ultimately will not be compatible with your lifestyle.
Choose Your Partner Based on Your Vision for Relationship
Significant others come in all shapes and sizes. Have you ever heard the adage, “opposites attract”? In reality, coherence is what binds people. To ensure you attract a coherent partner, it’s imperative to name your vision for the relationship. Get really detailed about it. I recommend writing down your list of what you want in a partner. Divide it into three categories: Non-negotiables, Nice to Haves, and Not Important.
About Inner Matrix Systems
Inner Matrix Systems, based in Denver, is a personal mastery training system for high achievers. For more than twenty years, IMS has delivered a proprietary methodology that rewires, trains, and aligns the nervous system, emotions, and thought strategies to create real-life results. CEO, Joey Klein, and IMS have worked with more than 80,000 individuals from around the world through both live and online training programs, as well as one-on-one coaching. Clients have included: Boeing, IBM, Dell, Google, Panda Express, Coca Cola and The World Health Organization. Joey is the author of The Inner Matrix: Leveraging the Art & Science of Personal Mastery to Create Real Life Results (June 2021).